Wrong decision...

How long has it been since I last felt this way,
How far is the drift that has gone astray,
To think I could go on without losing composure,
To carry on with this life excluding you from the picture...

You will always be there in the shadow of my heart,
Harassing whats left of whats been built from the start,
It has been years of me harboring this continuous torture,
For I have chosen a perverse turn from my life's juncture...

Bone
22 April 2011
4:31 am

It spells your name...

Missing you is a hobby now,
Every single day I solemnly vow,
Love for life will someday run dry,
I need you to give me and us a try...

Surround yourself with thoughts of me,
Summon myself into your fantasy,
Accept my love my heart my soul,
Reminisce the memories that time had stole...

Alas I have found my one true deity,
Zealous I am in obtaining her beauty,
A moment spent equals a shower of hope,
Leave all behind so that we both could elope...

I Miss You baby...


Bone
2 September 2010
2:34 am

Secrets..

Please baby I am so confused,
I am not happy and I am not amused,
You tell me stuff that only we know,
And then you make me feel ten feet below..

This is not fair and it does not feel right,
I want this to end without starting a fight,
I am man enough to know more if not all,
Trust me honey I am not going to fall..

But if you choose to suppress your thoughts,
I won't give a shit and I won't give a fuck,
Go ahead and keep your precious secrets,
I will stay away and keep my fucking distance..

Bone
20 July 2010
3.53 a.m.

Ten Times A Lot Equals You Mi Amo'..

Come on honey let's set things straight,
I can't get myself in if you won't open the gate,
Give me the passage thru so we could recreate,
Surrender to fate and become my soul mate..

You know I'd do anything to again taste your kiss,
Those sweet chew able lips that I owh so dearly miss,
Let's give love a try and together we reminisce,
Take me away and bring me out from this abyss..

Sure I can wait just a little bit longer,
Yes I will stay here and let it all linger,
Because I need you near to satisfy my hunger,
And baby you make me feel ten times stronger!

Roarr!

Bone
15 July 2010
7.15 p.m.

confessions to dispossession..

Umm its best that I write to u about how I feel rather than me saying it straight to ur face..it'll be less complicated and less embarrassing too..haha..so here it goes..babe..I like u..I like u a lot..and I'm sure that u notice..I'm sure that u know how I feel..we had a history..be it good or bad,it still is a history..but from my half,it was an experience that I will cherish till years to come..
I'm not begging..I'm not trying to trick u out into liking me or anything..this is just me being me..this is me being a coward coz I can't face u when it comes to elaborating more about how I feel..I'm very emotional about this somewhat pathetic too..and I takut I ternangis..haha!and this is me escaping rejection from face to face..I wrote something similar like this a few days back..the night when u said 'masa mula2 tada..macam biasa..tapi sekarang macam dah ada..sikit..'..lebih kurang la kan..but I didn't know how to end it..coz I myself wasn't sure about where I actually stand in ur current life..what's certain is that I still stand far off, way back then where He is..and I don't blame u, or him for that..coz I know how it feels to really luv someone..and its both good and twisted that u have that quality..good meaning that ure loyal and passionate..but twisted coz it lowers my chances in getting u to like me..haha..that's normal..I know..I'm not a little boy anymore..I can pretty much control my feelings..well,most of it.. :P
I've been receiving some mixed up signals and feelings for the past one or two weeks..some times I feel like I bore u..some times I feel like u miss me and u want me there..or it just could be that I'm the most convenient at that time for u..but I just can't stand it..I luv having you around..near me..I luv spending time with u..ure funny..ure cute..ure pretty..and most of all ure honest..sure, all of us have secrets but I would luv to keep the fact that u are what u are..u make me happy..and I luv me when I'm happy..hehe..
So here's the ending..the ending of my karangan..not us tau..haha..I don't wanna waste my time chasing a phantom..don't get me wrong..I luv chasing u..I luv doing things for u..with u..but ill always end up feeling a bit empty in my heart n soul when we say our goodbyes..it makes me want u more..so that u can fill the gap that's in me..u make me do things that I normally don't do..If u feel bad,please don't..be flattered that someone is head over heels for u..if u feel sad,please don't..be happy that I have the urge to have u near me and protect u..
Being friends would suffice..I don't mind..i won't fall that deep into the ground..I just don't wanna lose u like I did before..ahhh banyak lagi nak tulis tapi takut terlebih..sorry its long..but I need u..to know..I hope ure not dissapointed after reading this..I'm sorry..again..for messing up ur head..if I ever did or am..
Thank you for trusting me..and u can still always trust me after this..take care nyet..don't hate me!haha :( :)

14 july 2010
3.00 a.m.

Cepat lah you...

Sekarang you tahu apa I perlukan,
Now tell me apa you punya tindakan?
Mahu realisasikan you and me?
Or you just nak biarkan I macam ini?

Baik you cakap sebelum terlambat,
Explain dekat I selagi you sempat,
I boleh terimalah I bukan budak kecil,
Tidak semestinya usaha kita berhasil...

Sebab siang malam you yang I kenang,
Some say lautan api I sanggup berenang,
I bersedia to just leave it to destiny,
Tamatkan drama and fill my book of history...

Tergagap-gagap...grrrr...

Masa dulu you hilang lama,
Semuanya I punya angkara,
Tetapi sekarang you pulang semula,
Nampak macam tidak sengaja...

Bukan lah you jatuh cinta,
Maksud I you ada,
Mana-mana I pandang you ada,
Sedangkan hakikatnya you tiada...

Tapi apa yang boleh I buat?
I takut juga suatu hari nanti you meluat,
I tau diri I ini tidak cukup hebat,
You pun tahu hati I ini tidak cukup kuat...

Tapi you tahu kan kenapa I macam ni?
You tidak ingat semua benda yang terjadi?
Walaupun geseran antara cantuman ribuan tali,
Yes baby itu memang pertama kali...

Perasaan I ini masih boleh ditampung,
Tindakan drastik juga masih boleh dibendung,
Tapi takut dan tidak tahu siapa yang boleh tolong,
I tidak mahu nanti you pandang serong...